What's "home", anyway?

Today marks one year since Aqil, Afraz, and I (and technically Adam, as a fetus) have moved to Melbourne. It's a strange anniversary to celebrate. I mean, it's only Year 1 of the rest of our lives, really. It's almost like we shouldn't need to celebrate, you know what I mean? We're here permanently. There's no countdown to us leaving. This is it.

However, I still hesitate to call this place "home". I mean, it is and it isn't. It is where I live, where I raise my kids, where all their friends are, and where we spent most of this past year. And Dan's family have been so wonderful with making sure the kids and I feel loved up and settled in.

But Malaysia is still home to me. It's where most of my loved ones reside, where my favorite foods and places are, where I feel most independent and comfortable. When we came back from our trip to Malaysia recently, I cried for two whole days. I just missed Malaysia and everyone there so so much. Being back in Melbourne didn't feel like coming home; it felt like going away.

That being said, "home" has always been a little difficult to define for me. Growing up just outside London, I thought that was home. English was my first language, and it's where I went to school with all my friends. And then we uprooted and moved back to Malaysia when I was 9, and I had to re-define what I considered home.

Then, a decade later, I went off to college in the US. That's where I became an adult, and where I became a mother. Kalamazoo, MI, will always have a special place in my heart and is still somewhere I'd consider home, although initially I wanted to leave that place the day after I arrived! It took a little over a year for me to really feel at home there, now that I think about it.

So maybe that's it. Maybe I just need more time.

Or maybe I just need to guilt trip all of my friends and family into coming to visit more often to make this place feel more like home ;)

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