Now, about that third rule...

Yeah, you know, the third thing that makes you a glam mama: Love yourself. Now, let me make it clear: loving yourself is not the same thing as being selfish. What I'm talking about here is actions that nurture your psyche, appearance and well-being that ultimately makes you happy which subsequently makes you a better mother. Got that? Well, let me give you an example.

Today, despite my apprehension about leaving my children for pretty much the whole day, I went for the first class of my graduate studies (actually its the second class but the first class was cancelled because the lecturer had food poisoning which meant that...well, it's irrelevant to my point so let's go back to my original point before I go further off tangent as I tend to do). While it may seem selfish, which it did even to me at first, to put my babies through the trauma that they must go through when their usually fully present mother abandons them one day a week to pursue her studies, the truth is that in the end, its all for them. And I'm not saying that just to make myself feel better either!

We all go through days where we just feel like running away from our life as a SAHM or WAHM or even a WOHM (just admit it already!), and mostly its because we feel like we've neglected ourselves. Think about it. We spend all day and night with our children, attend their every need, spend every drop of energy, every dime that we have just to keep them fed, clean, happy and have a roof above their heads. But who is doing that for us? Mama needs some lovin' too!

I always say, motherhood is a thankless but incredibly rewarding experience. No one is going to write you a thank you note for all that you do because its "what all moms have to do". Society states "Just do your job and don't complain about it". Husbands, sweet as they are, are clueless to the fact that sometimes we just need some time and attention too. So, if no one is there to give us that, what happens to us? Well, we gotta love ourselves!

It can be something as small as taking a long hot shower while your hubby watches the kids, or going for a monthly pedi mani (or a facial, or a massage, or even a Brazilian if that's your thing - an added bonus is that it'll likely make the hubby happy too *LOL*), or in my case, finally taking the long-postponed leap of pursing my graduate studies. Having a hobby or two also does wonders for your psychological well-being, as does having a social life.

I'll admit, I wish I can practice all that I preach, but the truth is that I don't do all that. However, I do have a few things that I do to remind myself that I am loved, at least by me. I love to knit - I took it up just recently after years of procrastinating. I do it as much as I can - while nursing, in the passenger seat of the car while hubby drives or at night for about half an hour after the kids are asleep. An added bonus is that I get to enjoy the things that I make, or give them away as presents. I'll definitely be talking more about that later :)

And as for my social life...well, the truth is I don't get to see a lot of my single friends that often. I much prefer spending time with my kids than anyone else, so if I do want to see friends, I like to bring my kids, which most of my single friends find annoying (except for M and SR...they come to the house to see me, see my kids and sometimes even watch the kids while I take a long-overdue shower - now that's friendship!). I always rationalize that a social life can wait till the kids are older and aren't as dependent on me as they are now (if ever that day arrives, hahaha!).

I guess my point is, keep doing what makes you happy. As long as it isn't detrimental to the long-term well-being of your family, in the long run your happiness will ensure that your whole family remains happy. And if you really can't bear the thought of leaving your kids just so you can do something for yourself, bring them! I bring my kids out shopping all the time! I've even brought them to the salon while I got my hair done (with one other person there for chasing after the toddler, of course). Just because you're loving yourself, doesn't mean you gotta do it all alone.

So you see, it's simple: happy mama ---> happy family. Happy family ---> glam mama!


  1. "I much prefer spending time with my kids than anyone else"
    I second this, many singles/childless (not to generalise) do not understand that and label us "anti-social" just because we prefer to spend whatever balance time (both working parents) we have with out kids than with them.

    Good blog, keep it up, mama.

  2. Yep! It's definitely something only parents would truly understand. Even then, not all parents are that way :/ I guess it all depends on that single/childless person's level of empathy...and common sense ;)

  3. agree with both of to read your blog..inspires me to be a good sahm.muah muah..


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